my milky way writes back

Well, what do you know.... even though I've fully digested my Milky Way bar, star of a previous post, I got an email response to my query today. In all, I'm rather impressed with the tenor of the response (tho note the lack of mention of Snickers):

In response to your email regarding MILKY WAY BAR.

Thank you for your email.

Although peanuts are not part of the recipe for MILKY WAY BAR, we have added the statement "May Contain Peanuts" to our packages. Consumers who are highly allergic are accustomed to reading the ingredient declarations of products to look for the allergens to which they are sensitive. We feel it is important to provide these consumers with all related allergy information.

Masterfoods USA provides products that consumers who are allergic to nuts can safely enjoy. They are SKITTLES BRAND Candies and STARBURST BRAND Candies.

Sincerely,

Consumer Care
Masterfoods USA
A Division of Mars, Incorporated

MM/BEVITIMO007487617A

While I'm not entirely sure what the string of letters and numbers at the end of the message means, it may just be the poor milky way bar banging its head against the keyboard for having to recommend another Masterfoods USA competitor in case I'm one of those allergic-to-nut jobs. ;-)

And here I thought my Milky Way had a name like "Mike" or "Michelle" instead of the corporate-esqu "Consumer Care."

Maybe my Milky Way needs its own blog?

emailing the milky way folks

So much to do tonight, I just couldn't help the procrastination kicking in...

Craving something sweet, I stuck my hand in one of our big bags o' leftover Halloween candy and came up with a fun size Milky Way bar. Not my first choice, but a satisfactory candy-roulette result so I flipped it over in my paw to begin to tear open the wrapper when an email address caught my eye.

Specifically, the exhortation:

Questions or Comments? call 1-800-551-9985 or email us at AskMilkyway@MMMars.com

My candy now has an email address? What would a candy bar say if it could talk? What would a candy bar write if it could email? What the hell would I ask my candy bar?

Inspiration greeted me on the other side of the wrapper:

MAY CONTAIN PEANUTS

So I responded to my muse and sent the following off as my introductory email to my (now fully digested) Milky Way:

Hi,

Love your Milky Way candy bars. I was looking at the wrapper of a fun-size bar I got for Halloween and noticed it says "MAY CONTAIN PEANUTS"

Who decides whether a Milky Way bar will contain peanuts or not? Wouldn't including peanuts make it a Snickers?

Your fan,
Thomas

Will let you know what comes back my way. It's already been to long for the old auto-reply trick, but I think the email/call centers in Bangladesh are running at full steam at this hour.